It’s been over 10 years since we first dipped our toes into the hotwife lifestyle. What started as fantasy has become something much deeper, an experience we share, enjoy, and continue to grow through. I recently asked my wife some honest questions about how she feels now, after a decade of exploration, adventure, and more than a few unforgettable nights.
Here’s what she had to say…
Q1: What was your initial reaction when I brought up the idea of the hotwife lifestyle?
Honestly? I was excited. It wasn’t completely out of the blue, we’d had so many deep, playful, and sometimes steamy conversations over the years, and this just felt like one of those fantasies we were suddenly brave enough to chase. It felt daring, thrilling… and really intimate, actually.
But right behind that excitement came nerves. Would I actually go through with it? What if it didn’t feel right in the moment? What if we met someone awful? It was uncharted territory, and I wasn’t sure how it would go.
But knowing you were in it with me, that you were turned on by the idea, and that you wanted to explore this together, made me feel safe and incredibly turned on. The fact that I could experience something new, while knowing it would bring us closer? That was the most exciting part of all.
Q2: Has it changed our relationship?
In the best way.
We’ve always had a solid, happy relationship. But this added a whole new layer of connection. It pushed our communication to the next level, made our sex life more exciting, and deepened our trust like never before.
There’s something incredibly powerful about coming home after an experience and knowing I can tell you everything. No fear, no shame, just openness. And the way we connect afterwards, whether it’s through conversation, sex, or those long cuddles where we debrief everything… it’s honestly one of the most intimate parts of our life together now.
Q3: What’s been your favourite part of the Hotwife lifestyle?
This is going to sound bold, but I genuinely love the feeling of being desired by other men. Not because I need validation, but because it’s empowering to explore that side of myself with your full support.
I love that you’re part of the experience, whether you’re reading my texts, waiting for a message, or listening when I come home and tell you every detail. There’s a spark between us that only gets stronger each time we do this.
And knowing that I can enjoy these moments, while still being deeply connected to you is what makes it so special.
Q4: What’s been the biggest challenge?
There was one experience that caught both of us off guard. I connected with someone in a way I didn’t expect, and I didn’t handle it well, I didn’t communicate everything I should have, and I regret that.
It was never about wanting anything more than the moment, but it taught me how crucial honesty is in this lifestyle. Even small things can grow into problems if you don’t talk openly.
It shook me, because the idea of hurting you, or risking what we’ve built, was awful. It reminded me how much I love you, and how this lifestyle only works when we’re 100% in sync.
Q5: Have you ever done anything with them that you wouldn’t do with me?
No. I’ve explored new things, sure, but nothing I wouldn’t share with you or try with you too. If anything, it’s sparked ideas and helped us discover new layers of our sex life together.
You’ve always been the person I feel safest with, which is why I can be so open.
Q6: Does sex feel different than when we’re together?
When I’m having sex with someone else, I fully let go, I become their dirty little whore, their personal plaything, and I love being used like that. There’s something so raw and filthy about surrendering completely to the moment, to their desires. I do enjoy slipping into that same role with you too, but not every time. With you, it’s often about something deeper, telling you everything afterward, watching your reaction, feeling that intense connection build between us. Nothing compares to the closeness we share in those moments. That bond… that’s something no one else could ever touch.
Q7: Any advice for couples who are curious about starting?
Talk. A lot. And don’t rush.
Everything has to come from a place of honesty. If something doesn’t feel right, say it. If a boundary shifts, talk about it. This lifestyle can bring amazing closeness, but only if you’re both ready to be completely open.
Q8: Do people know, or is it a secret?
Mostly a secret. A couple of close friends know, people we completely trust. But overall, it’s private. And I think that makes it even more intimate. It’s our little world. Just for us.
Q9: Have you ever developed feelings for someone you see regularly?
Not romantic feelings, but yes, I’ve developed comfort, chemistry, and trust.
That doesn’t take away from what we have, it adds to it. I prefer meeting people more than once and building a bit of connection. It makes the whole experience feel more real, and much more enjoyable.
Q10: If you could change one rule, what would it be?
I think sometimes I wish I didn’t have to send a text or picture in the moment, especially with regulars. I know it’s part of the fun for you, and I do like sharing those moments, but now and then I just want to be fully present in what’s happening.
That said, I still love showing you everything afterwards, because of the way you react? That’s one of the best parts.
Q11: Is there something you haven’t done but really want to try?
There’s still a lot I haven’t done, and I’m open to exploring more, as long as we’re both on the same page.
Some things I’d want to talk to you about first, depending on how far they go, but I trust that we’d always decide together.
Q12: Have you ever met a couple with Harry? What did you think?
Yes, once. I was nervous, mostly because I’ve been honest about not really wanting to see you with another woman.
But I handled it better than I thought. It didn’t turn me on, but I wasn’t jealous either. It’s something I’m still figuring out, but I’m glad we tried it. You always make me feel safe, even when I’m unsure.
Q13: Do you ever meet someone just for Harry’s sake?
No. If I’m going to meet someone, it’s because I want to. That said, I love knowing how turned on you get from it. Sometimes I’ll be a bit lazy beforehand, thinking, “I’m not sure I’m in the mood,” but then I picture you waiting, wondering, wanting… and suddenly I am in the mood.
That connection, that shared spark, is what makes it all worth it.
Wrap Up:
After more than a decade, this lifestyle has been about so much more than sex, it’s deepened our trust, strengthened our connection, and kept the spark between us alive. We’ve faced challenges, but every conversation and every boundary we’ve explored has only brought us closer.
For anyone curious about starting, talk openly, stay honest, and never lose sight of each other. The sex is wild, the memories unforgettable, but the best part will always be coming home and knowing this is ours.
2 Responses
“ I become their dirty little whore, their personal plaything“. I love that my wife calls herself a slut, cock whore, fucktoy and often tells then “use me”
When ever Keeley uses those terms I get so excited. 🙂